Tag: dreams

Experiencing Awe

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Today the rain is pouring outside. Thick heavy drops splashing on the window ledge fill our home with a gentle roar. The weight of life rolling down the window panes and over the shingled roof. It feels exquisite to be inside watching the water pour and the tree limbs sway. It fills me with gratitude. We are cozy, warm, and safe. Thunder powerfully rumbles overhead. The size and shape of the clouds creating noise and energy that astounds and humbles me. To consider the magnitude of ever shifting and rolling momentum fills me with awe. 

The rain and the clouds hovering overhead, remind me of the gifts this world has to offer us. The plenty that surrounds and engulfs our daily life. We are so small in this ever expanding universe. Simple situations and worries can seem so monumental to us. And yet, from the perspective of the world these are small things. Our desires, hopes, fears – all of them are so tiny. And really, what is there to worry about? 

Petty embarrassments, moods, situations – all of these things change like the weather. In a flash of lighting the storm has moved on and our small problems are similar. Much like the temperature, rain fall, the wind, all of it can go from the thunderous and terrifying to a gentle kiss in an instant. As Pullitzer Prize winning journalist Mary Schmich tells us, “In the end the race is only against ourselves.”

It’s powerful to consider – if we are not on earth to rush to any destination or achieve some lofty goal. We may only be here for this time, the journey, and all of its twists and turns. Our role may not be to fix, solve, or remedy. Our existence my be our only purpose. Maybe that’s true and maybe it isn’t. Perhaps we too are only here for a brief moment and have no other objective than to experience the awe and wonder that is life. What is the purpose of the rain? Is it not already perfect? What if we too, are already perfect?

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Savor and Celebrate the Life We Have

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Today I am thinking about creating the life I want. Having so many goals and projects in the works can sometimes feel overwhelming. I want to build and create while also making time to nurture relationships and live my life. I often check in on myself to be sure that I am not just accomplishing, completing, or “working,” rather than living. 

I don’t want to be distracted for the best times of my life and unfortunately that’s really easy to do. In a culture that glorifies “busy,” it’s easy to be consumed with productivity. We’re trying to make a home, raising kids, and all of it feels like it’s big and important. We’re sprinting through the seasons sometimes and it seems that no sooner is one task complete than there are five, or fifteen, more to fill it.

Remember Your Goals

What helps me to get out of the hamster wheel and see the big picture is reminding myself that all of this was once a dream. A beautiful home, a healthy family, a partner I love and admire – all of these were items on a wish list that I once imagined for myself. 

I distinctly remember a morning in Chicago, driving from my aunt’s apartment downtown back to my college dorm in Rodgers Park. Thinking I’d like to work in a city but have a country home where I raised my family and did my writing. I like the idea of being near a large metropolis while also distant from other people. A chateau or country estate sounded perfect to me.

Find Where You Are

Flash forward fifteen years and here we are in our country home, mouse problems and all. We’re savoring sunsets, active in our local community, and live in a small town where we know people and are known pretty much everywhere we go. It feels so comfortable and also magical that this life I imagined one morning in undergrad is here. I dreamt of this time and this place. Having imagined this moment in my life, now that I’m here I want to savor it. I want to cherish what I have while still pursuing what comes next. 

Savor & Celebrate Your Progress

For me savoring looks like a cup of tea and a long lunch with my partner. It looks like giving our dog some extra love and attention. Sitting in the sun and meditating so that I am fully present here and now. It feels like hyyge – making myself comfortable and writing to express my thoughts and process my emotions. It is being still and listening to my children as they drift off to sleep. Extra kisses on soft cheeks and all the snuggles I can possibly fit into a day. It is “one more minute,” of play when I can give it and boundaries when I cannot. And taking care of myself so that I am here for a very long time to savor and celebrate a long life. If you’re looking for some tools to find your own focal points there’s a great guide here.

Notice What Fills You and Follow It

This life is about creating spaces where I am comfortable, inspired, held and free. Finding a way to make every hope, wish, and dream I have come true because when I am building and growing, and reading good books I feel whole. Eating good foods and traveling, inspires me and stretches my wings. Learning new things fills me up and keeps me interested and engaged. I am forever looking forward to all of the good that is here now, and all of the wonderful that is yet to come.

With the fall winds upon us our windows and doors are blanketed in ladybugs. Every one that lands and stays, every one that I must pick up and place outside drenches me in good luck and positive thoughts. I am fortunate, blessed, grateful for all that I have and eager to see what comes next! 

How do you savor and celebrate life’s special moments? What times have been your favorites? What sacred dream are you pursuing now?

Manifesting a New Year

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Our home has been littered with lady bugs this fall and so I have no doubt that luck and good fortune will find me in 2023. These sweet little omens seem to be showing that good luck will be beating down my door and crawling in through every crevice. Therefore this time is sacred and to be savored. Cheers to our 2nd Birthday AWritten! Here’s how I am manifesting a new year and what I hope to share with each of you on this site and in the world.

Goals

As I envision the year ahead and what I want more of in my life I am noticing patterns. This new year’s dreams are very focused on health, well-being, home, family, and travel. These are goals for my very real and current life. They are strategies of how to live joyfully, healthfully, fitfully, and authentically. These goals are about embracing family, building a close knit community, and engaging fully with life. 

Environment 

The year appears to be about rest and recovery. My focus is on creating spaces and environments that serve deeper care of self and family. The goal is to create convenience and useful spaces that support and serve our lives. This includes this space we share here – our virtual living room where we connect.

Methodology

The year will not be focused on accomplishments, though I am sure there will be many. Nor am I focusing on adventure or change – though both are inevitable. The focus for this new year is on savoring beauty, rest, natural wonders, delicious foods, and simple pleasures. 

I primarily envision this year in neutral colors though there are a couple bold choices that appeal to me as well. There is a lot of simple elegance and grace which feels both authentic and present – a goal worthy of pursuit. To create beauty, absorb and appreciate it in the natural world and in the creative endeavors of others. I want to appreciate what I have already without longing for what is to come.

Timing

There is a calling to shared love, and honesty. A welcoming of self and others to share in my life, hearth, and home. Together we grow, support and nurture health in our lives. Sharing gentle and generous wellbeing with family and friends. 

It is preparing so that when the appropriate moment arrives I am ready. I simply know that now is a time for comfort, serenity, and peace. My time feels as if it is finally stretching itself out and resting in the sun. I do not have so many obligations and responsibilities looming that I feel spread thin or unable to manage all of the demands on my time or energy. Honoring my own rhythm – working when it feels right, resting when that feels appropriate too. I am living in gentle respect for all things, the first of which is me.

Future State

I want you to feel care, elegance, and grace at every touchpoint and interaction. Making the conversion from visitor, to fan, to buyer, to evangelist seamless. I want to build relationships that feel like friendships and bonds that sustain the tests of time and turbulence – whatever that might be. A household name that is more like a friend, an aspiration, and an inspiration rather than a single item, book, or product. I want friends and strangers to feel welcomed, loved, accepted, appreciated. To feel held, free, and to have a reason to come back – as only true love can make us feel. 

I want you to know that in the background I am forever creating new material, exploring new topics, and learning all I can so that I may share my lessons learned with all of you. As we grow and plan for this space I am forever focusing on creating room for each of you to thrive here and in your own lives. 

How do you feel connected to this space? And how can our content that better serve you and your needs?

How to Pursue an Intimidating Dream

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I love the rejuvenating energy of early summer. The promise of fresh flowers, vegetables, and colors. I love the morning dew and how every leaf in my strawberry bed seems to be hiding some sweetness ready to be picked and devoured by my children. It always inspires me to dream bigger and imagine another fresh beginning for myself. It’s so exciting to dream bigger. I once read that if your dreams don’t scare you, you’re not dreaming big enough and it spoke to me. But I also realized that there are some very specific steps to take when we have a dream that is big, bold and beautiful that terrifies us. I want to share what I do when I get myself imagining some incredible things but need a little courage to go after it.

When a goal is definitely for me but I am hesitant to pursue it, out of fear or intimidation. I do the small things around it. A supplemental goal here, a similar but not quite goal there. I take smaller steps,  incremental progress is not substantial enough to scare me. I do just enough to move forward and slowly but surely that larger goal doesn’t seem so terrifying and it gets done too because the rest of the work is already complete.

Another way I face a goal that seems daunting or overwhelming is that I write out my fears and answer them. I write down all of the scary ideas that are floating around in my head. For example, 

“Will this be embarrassing? What if I fail? What if someone judges me and finds my work wanting?” 

And then I reply, “It could be embarrassing, so what? Will you die? No. Embarrassment has yet to kill anyone. If I fail I learn. And then I will be more prepared for whatever comes next. And there are always judges ready to heckle our work. Criticism is easy, showing up and stepping into the arena is hard – that’s why there are so many critics and so few artists. It’s hard because it matters. It’s on your list because it is your calling and your life’s work. You wouldn’t show up to do it if it weren’t important. And if you are judged perhaps you will help someone else to be brave by being first brave yourself. And who cares what someone else says, you do this work for you and you love it, if you’re proud of it, it does not matter what anyone else says about it.”

It’s incredibly empowering to give yourself guidance and a pep talk like this. It doesn’t have to be perfect, we don’t have to be perfect. We just need to hear that truth inside of us ringing clear and loud like a bell. That inner wisdom is giving us permission to show up and try. And oftentimes that is all the push I need to take the next step forward.

I hope these two little tips serve you and help you push past your inner critic to own and chase down those sacred dreams you hold in your heart. You have them for a reason, don’t let fear stop you from shining as brightly as possible. You are here to change the world and I can’t wait to watch you do it! 

Clearing the Clutter: Breaking Up with an Old Dream

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To create a new beginning something has to end. Many days I meditate on the the theme of clearing the clutter but today I moved actual boxes. I did the mental work first, the figurative exercise to create mental space, and to free my mind from the obligations that seem to fill up my brain and leave me with no additional bandwidth to perform the actual work. All of those exercises led me to the actual labor of lifting and moving actual boxes that had found a resting place in the middle of my office. 

The space is wide open and I feel lighter, freer, less weighed down by obligations and to-do items. I recently spent some time away with friends and we talked out our visions and plans for the future. We discussed our goals and our dreams for what our lives could look like in the next five or ten years. It was powerful deep dive stuff. My friend shared that she has some big picture goals for herself and her business but she doesn’t feel ready to pursue them. I want to share what I said to my dear and life-long friend with you – that is ok too!

It is ok to have dreams that we hold off on pursuing. We often feel a sense of urgency to complete tasks. This may come from competition with others or a desire to check something off our to-do lists. But sometimes we don’t want to do something because it is not right for us. Sometimes what felt like an incredible and exciting goal turns out to be adjacent to our path but not on our journey. And that’s ok. 

Fear in creativity is important, it tells us when we truly care about something. Sometimes though when we write and reflect we learn that that goal is no longer for us. That too is a victory, we have learned something important. Just because you have had something on your list for a long time does not mean you have to finish it. If you come to a place where it’s time to step forward or let a dream go, you can let it go. You are not obligated to complete every dream or every goal you imagine. Maybe you needed that inspiration to motivate you but now that particular goal, or version of that goal, is no longer necessary and that’s ok. It is ok to let go of something you don’t want. You don’t need to do it just to prove that you can. You’re not giving up on yourself or on every dream, you are simply recognizing that that goal is no longer meant for you. You are doing enough. You have done enough. 

You do not need to take on anyone else’s goal or anyone else’s vision, even if that goal belonged to a past version of yourself. That person did not know what you know now. That person did not have the steps behind them that you have. They made the best decision with the information they had at the time and now you know more. You are further up the mountain, your view is better and your knowledge enhanced.

Trust your gut – if you’re afraid, take small steps and see how quickly the dominoes fall. If you’re hesitating because a step is not right for you, pause, reflect, and if necessary recalibrate and move on. Once you release that item your list you have freed yourself to imagine new and bigger dreams that truly fit the path that you are on. It frees you to follow your right path. Sometimes it is just time to put things away and clear the space for whatever comes next and that is truly brave.

How do you reflect and recalibrate before moving forward? How do you choose your path with intention? What is a goal you had to leave behind in order to move forward?

Unlearning

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I’m eating a chocolate shortbread cookie with strawberry icing, it tastes like cold fresh jam. The flavor feels cool and refreshing on my tongue. It just feels so good to be treating myself so well.  Lately it seems as if I am actively unlearning all of the lessons trauma has taught me. I am learning to love myself and let others love me and it feels nurturing on a level I did not know I needed.

For a long time it didn’t matter if the gift was large or big – if I wanted a cookie, or a trip, or new luggage if those expenditures were for me they were too much. I could buy tickets for a flight to visit someone else, or if there was some obligation tied to the travel – then it was justifiable and there were strings of logic related to who was allowed, when it was allowed, and what was ok for me to enjoy if it was related to someone else. I could not afford to go on vacation – but my friend’s mother passed and so a four day trip to Las Vegas was acceptable because it was to comfort her. 

There was nothing too pricey for my children or my extended family but my partner was on the same level as myself – they didn’t really need anything, much like I didn’t really “need,” anything. Lately that has shifted. I am finding that I myself have wants, needs, desires that long to be met. They linger if they go unanswered for too long. My wanting new clothes, or shoes, or a bag that I will have spent hours investigating and pouring over online used to be activities that would consume me and leave me feeling unfulfilled. I felt unworthy of care but I am finding now that investing in myself, investing in the things I want is very satisfying. It gives me the freedom to stop fixating on whatever that item was and move on to living with that gift. It is interesting and sad that so much time was spent denying myself that which I wanted most.

Simple things like a sweet treat at the bakery, mid-range things like a new purse, or luggage set, an adventure or trip to some far off place that might delight or inspire me to create some new art or reimagine my priorities in a new way. These gifts help me along on my journey. They make my path more delightful, richer, and more pleasurable. Feeling that nurtured, supported, and cared for by myself inherently shifts the way I view myself and the world. 

The kindness I am showing myself transforms the way I relate to others and myself. Because I no longer save the best for someone else, or treat myself as if I am not worthy or deserving of life’s joys and pleasures, I am enjoying those delights myself. I am planting seeds in my own soil and coaxing inner growth and development first. I am not giving all of the best I have to offer away. I am nurturing myself. I am giving to me first and that is a powerful shift. It takes a little time and I am not perfect – I still have not purchased the bag or the luggage and I still haven’t booked a vacation just for my partner and me or just for myself but I’m getting there. I’m writing about it and that tells me it is important. It is something I need to do for myself. If I’ve been thinking about it for several months, in the immortal words of the Doors, “the time to hesitate is through.” I am buying the bag and then I will write about how that makes me feel. Not for a holiday or because I did some extra work that proved I am “now,” worthy. I am just buying it because I want it and because having that item will bring me joy. I’m off to purchase a suitcase and already I feel incredibly spoiled. 

What was the last simple pleasure you gave yourself?

Expansive Meditations: Choose Your Own Adventure

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This afternoon I was completely lost in my meditation. I awakened to a feeling of lightness, freedom, and expansiveness. I lay down with the impression that I would focus on the concept, “Nothing in Nature Blooms All Year,” or “Blooming where you are planted.” Instead I feel stretched wide open and eager to make plans. I feel as if I have an opportunity to see the wide world and try new things. I am feeling like growth personified. 

We are in the midst of planning several vacations and adventures. We are dreaming of what comes next for us and what we want to do in the future. I feel burst wide open with possibilities. I could hire a yoga instructor and coach to join my girlfriends for a day on our lady-retreat. I could begin making reservations for our family vacation to see a certain mouse. I could hire my friend to take my updated portraits for my professional profile. I am brimming with ideas and when I lay down to be still and absorb I felt as if I had a finite number of items on my list and that I wanted to accomplish. Now, I feel like there is so much inspiration pouring in from every direction. The shift comes from choosing my guided meditation intentionally.

I often get into a comfortable rut, listening to the same meditations day in and day out, hoping that I will maintain the lessons I am attempting to learn by reinforcing and repeating the ideas shared. This can be true, it can be wonderful to listen to the same meditations over time as they are a solid touchpoint that remind me to be still and to savor certain concepts. However, it is just as important to spice things up – to choose the guided meditation intentionally. This process can be as simple as scrolling. 

I like to choose a guided meditation from a collection I know and trust. I like Sarah Raymond’s voice from the Mindful Movement and truly feel comfortable with her as my guide. Therefore, I quickly eliminate the vast majority of guided meditations that are not hers. I also choose my meditations based on the amount of time I have to spend, if I have time for a longer meditation I enjoy it. But if I feel rushed or stressed it distracts from the experience and so I’m sure to choose a meditation that helps me to keep my schedule and absorb what I can in the allotted timeframe. Then I search and scroll based on the parameters I have already chosen – some days it is trust in myself, other days it is inspiration to start something new. There are so many options but I often find exactly the meditation that speaks to me. And when I feel like the meditation I use is directly linked to my frame of mind it feels even more impactful and effective. 

Today I came in small and left big. It is thrilling to feel so large and wide and free. Having the inspiration to meditate is an excellent first step – but enjoying the benefits, living the calm peace and joy that comes of feeling spiritually, emotionally, and mentally aligned is a priceless gift.

How does meditation make you feel? Do you choose the same guided meditations over and over or do you change it up? What guided meditations do you enjoy most? 

Manifesting Your Best Life

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One of my favorite things to do is manifest my best life. For me manifesting means that I envision what wonderful things I want in my life and then I celebrate when they arrive. I dream, envision, and picture. Here are some of the ways I make Manifesting work for me. 

Set a clear intention and Pinterest – Not everything I want is present and accounted for in a perfectly curated board but much of it is. Yes, some of my boards are big imaginings that will take years to accomplish – my chateau based retreat for women, that is vivid and strong but not what I’m working on right away, that’s a 15 to 20 year dream. I use the site to envision my next home and my dream for a writer’s cottage – the result is a next home that looks cottage-y and will encapsulate all of the beautiful hopes and dreams I have pinned and imagined already. 

Sidebar: I couldn’t be more excited or thrilled with what awaits me and my family in our new home.

Curate the Pinterest board. While I’m building the dream I grab everything that remotely connects to my vision. Then I go back through my pins to find what truly speaks to me. I edit. I delete. I save from other sources and really hone in on what I love in each image. Do I love the design of the room or the furniture? I want to see an image and have it consistently reaffirm my vision. I don’t want to be confused each time a picture pops up, and when that happens I remove it because it clouds my vision and I want to be super clear and deliberate in what I am manifesting in my own life.

Reframe the desire. I write this out in my journaling and I ask the question out loud so I hear my own voice asking – “How did I get so lucky as to have (insert your dream here) a seven bedroom, seven bathroom, home close to downtown with enough space to host lacrosse practices, a pottage garden, and walking paths similar to Versailles?” This is a lot closer to the vision that I have than you would believe. And these are the things I want. Now, did I get all of these things? No! But I got closer than I ever thought possible.

The trick is the framing of my Manifestation as a question, “How did I get so lucky?” Because then instead of some random imagined future that is beyond reach now my brain now sees it as a question. A question is something unfinished that needs an answer. The brain is a magical tool and by framing what I want to manifest as a question my mind starts to work on the problem. It starts looking for opportunities and solutions that it wasn’t looking for before. My brain looks for patterns and options and even when I am not thinking about Manifesting specifically – like when I am asleep or out with friends – my brain is still looking for answers to this question, and in this way I make my own luck. My mind is constantly looking for ways to solve this problem and eventually, it finds a way to do it!

Write down your wish list. Long ago when I was single lady I sat down to write out what I was looking for in an ideal partner. I typed up a list of the qualities I wanted in my life partner – not just tall, dark, handsome but makes me laugh, shares my values, and loves children. I called it my, “Husband Position Description,” and I got detailed, detached earlobes were on the list as were a preference for eating the other half of the Chex mix – the pieces I don’t like. No sense letting half the bag go to waste! 

I wrote the list and I forgot about it. Saved it to a file and didn’t think about it again, until years later when I was living with a man who would become my husband and came across an old document. I read through that list again and my partner checked every box on that list. That was a powerful moment, because I did not know him when I wrote that list, I only imagined that he was out in the world waiting for me to find him and then I lived my life. I met and dated men who were not him, I went to work, and out with friends. But my brain was on the look-out. My sub-conscious was weighing and measuring, checking and comparing, because it was looking to hire the perfect candidate for this position opening. And when I had found him, my sub-conscious reminded my conscious of the list so they could confirm and affirm what my brain already knew, I had found the one. 

Have faith. The biggest part here is the faith I have in the universe and God. I am a firm believer that what you put out into the universe is what comes back to you. If you send out doubt, fear, and insecurity that is what you get in return. Therefore, it is super important to send out only what you want most for yourself. Send out your hopes and blind faith and trust that what is meant for you will arrive and that which is not meant for you will pass you by. This means that even when something is taking longer than you think it should to arrive or when there is an unexpected detour you still trust and believe that your Manifestation is coming. It’s keeping that energy, that trust, that commitment to your goal. 

We must believe and trust that, “Everything arrives at its appointed time.” Your manifestation will arrive at its appointed time. You will get what you are looking for and it can feel like a perfect fit or a magical surprise when what you want shows up but God does not give you a dream that you cannot fulfill. There is no longing in your heart that was placed there to be unattainable. Everything you want, wish for, desire is within your reach. You just have to trust yourself, you mind, and your God to work those miracles for you. Pursue those goals, manifest those dreams, it’s what you are here to do! You are not here to be miserable, small, and sad. You are here to reach for stars, to build pyramids, and dance. You are here to fulfill a purpose, don’t waste your time doubting it, that serves no one. Trust yourself, you mind, and your God and watch for what you will Manifest next!