Tag: Flight

Take a Break

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When we are pushing against an obstacle – physical or mental – we feel as if we are either pushing through or failing to push through. If instead we look to our obstacle as a resting point. We lean against the boulder instead of insisting on pushing we see there are other options. Take a break and see what you observe.

Relaxing into resistance frees you to see the full picture. In anger our attention is focused and limited When we feel threatened we are in fight, flight, or freeze mode. We operate on a very small data set, not seeing the full picture. We only see our escape routes, or the lack thereof. When we relax into our resistance – whatever it may be it allows us to see a fuller range of options. 

It is Sisyphus in Greek mythology that was doomed by the Gods to push the same boulder uphill again and again. Each day pushing forward on the same rock on the same hill, only to see the boulder fall again to the bottom every time he got close to the top. He did not even have the pleasure of new hills where he could at least see progress. The meaning of our work is tied not only to its completion but to the feeling that we have contributed in some meaningful way. Even if the lesson is only through the example of our failure. 

As human beings we are inspired by purpose and the meaning of our contributions. When we fight our obstacles instead of learning from them we fail to contribute. Could it be time to take a break? Could we walk around the obstacle instead? There is something meaningful to be found within the things we resist. Resistance and obstacles exist to teach us something. It is our responsibility to figure out what.

Maybe our task is to forge a new path or look in a new direction. We cannot know until we relax against the obstacle and stop fighting it. Releasing anger or frustration frees us to see new  avenues and opportunities. The resistance is not the problem but rather our emotional reactions to resistance are the problem. When we focus on the frustration or anger we are missing the lesson. The key is not push harder it is instead to rest, look around. Observe what gift this situation trying to give you and how can you learn that lesson and move forward? 

Accept the lesson, free yourself from the stress of the situation, and embrace what comes next. We make the meaning in our own lives. Let us not waste energy resisting the lessons along the way. How can you relax into your resistance? Take a break. I wish you peace, joy, and the pleasure of giving up on anger.

Release Responsibility + Control

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Spring is in bloom here in Ohio and I am experiencing a creative reawakening. It is a conscious remembering that what we ask for the universe provides. We are showing up in new ways, refreshed and transformed. Making space for those activities that bring me joy and that inspire me. I am no longer available for those activities that drain my energy or leave me feeling unfulfilled. There is a natural resurgence of energy as if spring demands a release of responsibility and control.

To show up authentically we release all of those things we do not need. We are born naked, what can we take off? What do we no longer need to bear the burden of carrying? I have found in life that it is incredibly easy to take on things that are not my own. We collect obligations, tasks, work, and labor. I have held onto many things out of a false sense of responsibility. A desire to fix what is not mine to repair.

I once received a powerful bit of advice from a stranger in passing. She said, “Love is not meant to be held or given, it is meant to flow through us.” In this way all energy and emotion should pass through our lives. The goal is to be porous like sponges, able to absorb only that which is intended for us and release the rest. This allows everything not meant for us to pass quickly without lingering. Another way to think of this message, “those mountains you are carrying, you were only meant to climb.” 

Author Anne Lamott asks, “What is help if not the sunny side of control?” Releasing control is the greatest gift we can offer to ourselves and others. To release control we remember that our value is not tied to our productivity or performance. We all have intrinsic value. When we purge all of the things that are no longer ours we make space for the relationships, experiences, and gifts that we are intended to receive. We trust that that which is meant for us will come to us. We need not be responsible for more than our fair share of work or duty. Our value is not tied to our labor or our misplaced obligations to fix, repair, or care for others. 

We are here to create and give the best of ourselves to the world. As we create our own paths, let use put down the mountains we have carried. Let us climb them instead and leave all of the extra weight that rightfully belongs to other people for them to manage. This spring we are no longer bearing the burden of someone else’s mistakes or issues. Each of us is free to manifest our own destiny, no longer encumbered by the burden of false responsibility or control. We are free. 

Doesn’t the relief feel incredible?