How to Carry Less Baggage

I surprised myself today. My plan was to organize my lists and dreams into a small pile that I might take it with me to Florida for a retreat with my college friends. We are planning lots of time to talk and have fun together. But also time to ourselves to plan, write, and strategize our next professional moves. I am looking forward to learning from these women. There is so much they bring to the table and I can’t wait to absorb all that I can from them and their experiences. 

My surprise came when I thought I had streamlined my pages of inspiration. Whenever I find inspiring images or ideas in a magazine I take them with me. Cutting and pasting ideas into a journal. Throughout the year I collect images and words that move me and when I feel inspired I cut them out. The plan was to bring these momentos with me to add to the conversation and my personal reflection.

The small pile of cutouts and plans is ONLY organized once, maybe twice annually. So when I tried to pull these scraps of paper together, the notebooks, and magazines quickly and easily filled my carry on. As I looked down at all of the ideas I made the executive decision to leave everything at home. I will build the new rather than repair the old. Today I will carry less baggage. These meaningful pieces that I have saved will be there in December when I’m ready to go through them. Until then, I am freeing myself of the obligation to carry them with me.

I find that this process can be helpful when I’m envisioning my future, to have pictures, words, or ideas that I wan tot remember. It can also be a burden, when we feel obligated or overcome by the sheer volume of exciting opportunities we might wish to partake in. It is cathartic to release yourself from responsibility. You don’t have to carry all of these things forward with you. For me these items only have value as long as they are serving my growth and happiness. If they become a distraction from the enjoyment of my life, they simply have to go.

Even though I was ready to dive deep into inspiration on this trip. I realize this process is a personal one. It is not done while chatting over hot beverages. Crafting my future is done in sanctuary. For me the sacred in between time of Christmas and New Years. Rather than be worried about this I accept it. I need to carry less baggage. I unpacked the paper scraps and filled my carryon with swimsuits, beach cover-ups, and sandals. We’re going to talk about big ideas – my inspiration will only grow – and what I need is less baggage when I come to the conversation.

How do you release yourself from feelings of obligation? Do you hold onto ideas that inspire you? How do you carry less baggage?

Trusting the Universe and it’s Timing

Some days I get impatient with my blessings. I want certain things to arrive by a specific date. Or I am tired of waiting because I want something fun and exciting to start. But as I do this I am wishing away the joy of the moment. I am envisioning some better tomorrow when what I have and what I only have ever – is this moment right now. Wishing for another day so some future pleasure or experience to delight me distracts from the wonder and the beauty of the present moment. It’s what Daniel Tiger calls, “Enjoy the Wow in the Now.”

Those words are magic at our house – and so apropos particularly when talking with our children. They are so eager for dessert, a family movie night, or for the weekend that it’s easy to forget that what they’re doing in the moment is pretty lovely too – eating a home cooked meal with family, reading and cuddling on the couch, or on their way to practice a sport or activity that they love. As an adult it’s pretty easy to get caught up in this mindset too – constantly wishing and hoping for what comes next and forgetting to enjoy the moment. Particularly because everything that I once dreamed of I am enjoying now. 

My entire life was once a hope and a dream that has manifested before me. I was speaking with my Grandmother recently and we were going through so old family papers, mixed in the pile was a letter she had sent as a young mother to her own mother on vacation in Florida. She wrote of the schedule her children were keeping that week and as I read she laughed. She said, “I have no idea how I kept track of all of that!”

The woman raised eight children and the list of activities, cub scout meetings, instrument practices, lessons, and dinners was incredible – what impressed me even more was that not only did she have time to remember all of those things but she sent dinner over for her mother’s neighbors, picked up the mail at her mom’s house, and had time to write the letter I was now reading. The woman is a legend. And in all honesty even with email reminders, my various calendars, and sticky notes I can barely keep track of our sweet little family of four let alone, juggling which kid was given permission to borrow the car and what lessons they were delivering the rest to attend before going to work. 

My grandmother says those were the happiest time in her life, those days when she was so busy she just did things all day. And she points out that she didn’t know it then. Because how could she have? I think it’s a wonder she even brushed her teeth or remembered to comb her hair. And yet she did it all, she wore lovely dresses, was an active member of her church, President of the Mother’s Club at her son’s school, and a devoted and loving parent and partner. When I look at a life like hers I am struck by how she must have lived in the moment. She must have remained focused on each task as a single step. 

I am not jealous or eager to replicate her “Busy,” but what I believe the pace of her life did was force her to be in the moment. She didn’t have an opportunity to focus on the future or to strategize because with so many moving parts, pieces, people, she had to be fully present exactly where she was at that moment. And that is what I strive to remember.

When I am longing for the future or eager to skip ahead to the part where I’m a famous writer, traveling in private jets, appearing on talk shows to discuss my work, and speaking to large groups to share what I have learned along the way I try to remember that the magic is happening right now. The magic is in my son inviting me to come play with him. The magic is in the moment as I write these words. The magic is not some distant goal or dream – which will come whenever the universe and I am ready, I have no doubt. The magic is in enjoying this moment – the process of writing, the delight that comes when my child and I are playing in our imaginations together, and the very real and sacred beauty that exists in the here and now. The silence of my studio, the warm glow of the light at my side, the rumble in my tummy that tells me it’s time for dinner. All of this is a gift for which I am truly grateful. This life is so wonderful and there will be more amazing and wonderful things to come however the most magic exists in the here and now and the best thing I can do is be present and savor it because this is truly the best time of my life and the only time I have to live it.