Tag: goals

Collecting Inspiration

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Throughout the year, I collect inspiration from cutouts and images in magazines. They keep me focused on what I am working toward. The pieces I really love get mounted on my vision board.

I often find when I sit down to organize these bits of inspiration at the end of the year many of them no longer speak to me. Their influence was brief and fleeting. I recycle the images and articles that no longer appeal to me. 

The pieces I like but don’t need to see every day are glued or taped into journals. This way the quotes and images I have collected continue to inspire me. But the big and important, still rock me to my core, pieces are posted on my vision board.

My vision board keeps me on task. The board stays out until I have my path memorized by heart. I carry it with me in my memory and then only pull out the board sporadically when I need a reminder.

I collect inspiration almost constantly but the vision board is revisited only twice annually. Once at the end of the year and early January when it is being created. The second time I open it is for Christmas in July or the year’s midpoint to consider and check my progress. It is incredible how these ideas that were once thoughts in my head become reality. To see those concepts I once imagined integrated into my lifestyle feels complete. 

How do you manifest your best life? What tools do you use to stay on task?

Building Mental Strength

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I have been thinking a lot lately about how the muscles we exercise are the muscles that we strengthen. When we focus on our arms or legs we first increase flexibility, endurance, and then begin to see gains. Increases in our ability to lift or move larger objects. The endurance to run longer distances without overexertion. The ability to work harder, longer, faster, etc. All of these capabilities that were not ours at the outset of our exercise become easier for us. This happens too with our mental strength and resilience.  

I’m realizing that as I observe and take in information that is primarily negative that these are the mental muscles I am choosing to exercise. When my perspective is of judgement, suspicion, or worst case scenario that is what will likely appear. As I look for the negative I will find it. Much as if I look for the positive I would find evidence of that. The choice is ours of what perspective we decide to bring to our interactions. Am I looking for help, hope, and optimism? OR am I looking for judgement, hurt, and negativity? 

When we fixate on the negative or worst case scenario those are the thought patterns we encourage to grow. This happens easily when we fixate on negative news, or patterns. However, we can give ourselves grace as the pursuit of any goal takes time. As we work toward any goal – writing a book, painting, or yoga – we give our attention to that goal. The more time and energy we devote the better we get at that activity. As we focus our attention we learn more. Testing theories and learning from our mistakes.

The mental muscles and the patterns that I want to strengthen are those focused on drawing joy, hope, generosity, light and love into my life. I do that by being attentive to those patterns. By shifting my focus from, “What is wrong with this picture,” to “What is going right here?” Or better yet, “How can I improve this picture?” 

With a renewed and optimistic perspective I am striving to make a positive impact not just in my own life but also in the world. This mental strength shift requires intention and attention. It also requires that I do the work of looking for the good in others, in myself, and in the world. It means that my mental strengths need to shift from judgment to support and aid. With time we will start to see the good things first in one another and ourselves.

Let’s try a new mental workout routine to shift our perspectives from disengaged boredom to being the change we wish to see in the world. I hope you will join me.

Preparing for a New Year

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As I prepare for the closing of one year and the opening of another I like to collect my journals. Each morning I write three pages of whatever comes to mind.* Sometimes it’s short stories, or a letter, or just complaining about whatever has me in a funk that morning. Some days it’s all about the weather or good news. It depends on the day. But often littered inside all of this writing there are gems – lists, to do items, goals. Dreams I have that I haven’t examined more deeply. These ideas may be used to write your resolutions.

Now at the end of the year, I am reviewing my journal entries and looking for goals and ideas. Sparks that I have had in the last twelve months that I either wish to make progress on or would like to add to my plans for 2023. I also do a word-web and find what is most inspiring or rising to the top of my list but we’ll talk about that in another post. What is most important is the focus on what I’ve already put on paper. I am highlighting and documenting these items on a list – if they were important enough to write down once, they’re important enough to write down again. 

My strategy is to combine all of these ideas into a list and then separate that list by topic – I like my resolutions to fit into several areas of wellness:

Spirituality

Physical Health + Fitness

Mental Wellbeing

Social circles – Family + Friends

Community + Charitable Works

Career

Financial 

Looking at my goals and where they fall in this list it shows me where I’m focusing my energies. And perhaps where I need more growth in the coming year. If my list is long and heavy in career but I only have “take more walks,” in my physical fitness area, I know that fitness needs a little more focus. Of course, these will never all be equal, there are some areas that are harder and some years where we’re just not ready to tackle a big project – like spirituality. These areas all require work and attention in order for us to live balanced lives. The goal here though is not to look at these as tasks or errands. If anything they are guide posts.

Will I achieve everything on my list in 2023? Absolutely not! I didn’t finish this work in 2022 and chances are I won’t get to finish everything on my list this year either. However, it does give me a place to start. It gives me an opportunity to see where my interest and focus has been in 2022 and to show myself some gratitude because littered in among the dreams for the future are also my accomplishments. Seeing my accomplishments highlighted (in a different color) feels pretty great. It’s incredibly empowering to look over a year of writing and see how much I’ve grown, to look back at happy times or see how I worked through challenges and obstacles. 

However you choose to organize your resolutions or plans for the coming year, I hope you take some time to yourself to take stock of how far you’ve come. I know I am always proud and impressed by the work I have done in a single year. The next year will bring its own challenges and opportunities. I hope we all come to it honestly and authentically, aware of who we are and what we are working towards. When we know what we want we can align our steps and plans to achieve it. 

This tool is just one of the ways I clear space and organize my strategy for the coming year. It’s time consuming but also a labor of love. A gift I give to myself as the year winds down. A little space and time to reminisce and reflect on who I have been. Which gives me better insight into who I hope to become in the next year. 

May your New Year’s be peaceful and serene. May your resolutions scare you just enough to inspire you to work hard. I wish you balance, light, and love in every day of this New Year! I look forward to seeing more of you in 2023. – M

*Morning Pages is a concept created by Julia Cameron. If you want to learn more I highly recommend her book, “The Artist’s Way.”

The Rule of Thirds

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Whenever we are pursuing an important goal it is important to remember the rule of thirds. Olympians and their coaches use this measure to align their training schedule. The goal is to be sure we are applying enough pressure to succeed while avoiding injury and overwhelm. The key is to rest so that elite athletes may carry on rather than give up. The rule of thirds is is a growth strategy and progress check. It is not just for Olympians or athletes. The rule is this – as you pursue a goal, your path will typically follow this formula.

1/3 will be wonderful. You’re going to stick your landings and feel terrific. 

1/3 will be terrible. You’re going to make mistakes and feel like you’re not doing things properly.

1/3 will be fine. You’re moving ahead but don’t feel strongly either way.

What’s important is that you pay attention to how you’re feeling. If it feels great all the time maybe you’re not pushing yourself hard enough. Perhaps things are too easy and you’re not progressing. Maybe you’ve plateaued and you’re not pushing hard enough. 

If you feel terrible for more than a third of the time, maybe you’re pushing too hard. Maybe you need to rest or consider a different approach. Maybe there are several small steps you can take instead of the giant leap you are fixated on at that moment. Taking a break for recovery is a necessary and important component to long term success and goal attainment. 

Trust your experience and the rule of thirds to inform your decisions. If you feel terrible all the time or even just more than a third of the time, maybe you don’t want to be doing this. Is there another path that is calling to you to try? Maybe you love the sport but would be happier coaching. Maybe you love the field but want to try another area of expertise.

The final third will be relatively uneventful days. You feel good but not great and like you could do better but you’re not at your worst. These are good days too. The same applies as the other two thirds, if it’s too easy add some challenges and if it’s too challenging relieve some of that pressure. If you’re consistently moving forward there’s no reason why you should be swaying in any one direction for more than a third of the time. 

So take a deep breath and remember that the feeling is temporary. If you swing too far in any one direction it might be time for a change. Paying attention to how you feel helps you to know you’re on the right path. We all want to attain our goals and we pursue them doggedly. Just make sure that your labor is one of love. We do this work because we love it. Because it brings us joy, and because it connects us to our higher purpose. When you’re chasing a dream and aligned with your purpose the rule of thirds is a great tool that helps keep the balance. 

New Season New Goals

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Today is one of those blissful days in the change of season. It is warmer than usual. The sun is shining brightly. There is a beautiful breeze wafting through our windows, allowing us to air out the house. How lovely to have this day to myself. I want so share some of the things that I am enjoying today in hopes that they serve you too. Maybe it will inspire you to do your own fall refresh and maybe create some new goals.

Journaling – Adding images, magazine cutouts or drawings, to the pages I have written but not filled the whole page. I am also looking to find where I have littered and sprinkled my ideas like fairy dust on the pages. I am getting ready for the new season. Part of that journey is writing down my goals and reflecting on the accomplishments that I have attained already.

Reflection – I want to try to begin my days with a bit of reading. Books inspire and uplift me. I am way too easily drawn in by inspirational pieces and well written books. I rush through them, eager to find out what happens next. It’s best to set a timer.

Meal Plan – I wrote down some recipes that I enjoy and don’t want to be without this winter. I recently found them floating around in the pictures on my phone. Recipes for seasonal favorites include: Cranberry Tea, that makes our house smell like Christmas. And Hungarian Goulash an incredibly simple, rich, and delicious meal that cooks for a long time. This meal fills our home with savory and cozy smells that warm you up even before you take a bite. The perfect hygge treat after a cold day of playing outside in the snow. I love collecting and preparing these simple delectable dishes. Foods and traditions that warm the spirit and the heart, make life so much richer.

Goal Refresh – I began a refresh of my vision board. I had planned to organize some magazine images I clipped with the intention of adding them to my vision board. The beauty of the vision board is that in addition to inspiration it also reminds me of how far I’ve come. I try to update the board annually with the goals I want to carry with me into the new year.

To make space for the new goals I have to remove those that I have already accomplished. It is always a delightful revelation when an image is ready to come down. I don’t throw these out. To preserve them, I gently cut them down and tape them into my journals. Including a small note reminds me why they are important. Once in the journal they continue to remind me of how far I have come. 

It feels so good to be moving forward. There are so many goals that I have been able to complete this year. I have worked hard to get where I am. And it is always nice to have a little time to reflect. I love to savor and celebrate these small moments. 

How to Rebound from Disappointment

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Today I am eating shortbread cookies from the Honolulu cookie company as I rebound from disappointment. The cookies are shaped like pineapples, dipped in white chocolate and coconut flakes. They are dainty and light, possibly the best cookies I have ever had. They are from a place that I have never been but long to visit. These cookies taste like sunshine, island breezes, bright flowers, crystal blue waters, and fresh air. They are the essence of escapism, made sweeter by the fact that they are a gift from someone who loves me and was thinking of me on their last trip to Hawaii. These are all joyful notes that are serving to put me into a better frame of mind. 

Today I will also purchase a couple of items that I have saved up for but have yet to buy. They are sitting in my cart and now is the moment. I need some joy and something happy to look forward to. I am going to give myself the gift of cozy winter gear and new drapes. These aren’t huge investments but they are investments in my own joy and happiness, both worthy and important. Whenever I face rejection I remind myself that my success or failure is not tied to my personal value or self.

I also hug my family extra tight and remind myself that some things have nothing to do with me. It helps to remind myself that the universe always has my best interest in mind. That which is meant for me I can’t screw up or loose. And those things not meant for me will pass me by, that is the nature of things. I just have to trust that this opportunity was not meant for me right now and that’s ok. 

I am learning to let go. Even though I am disappointed, I get to cuddle my kiddos, eat a good dinner, and get some rest. Today was a hard day but tomorrow will be better. I will get through this just as I have successfully gotten through every challenge I have faced up until now. I’ve got this, even if it doesn’t feel like it. I am going to fake it until I believe it. And even though today was hard, tomorrow will be easier. I just know it.

How do you rebound from disappointment? How are you more gentle or generous to yourself?

Savor and Celebrate the Life We Have

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Today I am thinking about creating the life I want. Having so many goals and projects in the works can sometimes feel overwhelming. I want to build and create while also making time to nurture relationships and live my life. I often check in on myself to be sure that I am not just accomplishing, completing, or “working,” rather than living. 

I don’t want to be distracted for the best times of my life and unfortunately that’s really easy to do. In a culture that glorifies “busy,” it’s easy to be consumed with productivity. We’re trying to make a home, raising kids, and all of it feels like it’s big and important. We’re sprinting through the seasons sometimes and it seems that no sooner is one task complete than there are five, or fifteen, more to fill it.

Remember Your Goals

What helps me to get out of the hamster wheel and see the big picture is reminding myself that all of this was once a dream. A beautiful home, a healthy family, a partner I love and admire – all of these were items on a wish list that I once imagined for myself. 

I distinctly remember a morning in Chicago, driving from my aunt’s apartment downtown back to my college dorm in Rodgers Park. Thinking I’d like to work in a city but have a country home where I raised my family and did my writing. I like the idea of being near a large metropolis while also distant from other people. A chateau or country estate sounded perfect to me.

Find Where You Are

Flash forward fifteen years and here we are in our country home, mouse problems and all. We’re savoring sunsets, active in our local community, and live in a small town where we know people and are known pretty much everywhere we go. It feels so comfortable and also magical that this life I imagined one morning in undergrad is here. I dreamt of this time and this place. Having imagined this moment in my life, now that I’m here I want to savor it. I want to cherish what I have while still pursuing what comes next. 

Savor & Celebrate Your Progress

For me savoring looks like a cup of tea and a long lunch with my partner. It looks like giving our dog some extra love and attention. Sitting in the sun and meditating so that I am fully present here and now. It feels like hyyge – making myself comfortable and writing to express my thoughts and process my emotions. It is being still and listening to my children as they drift off to sleep. Extra kisses on soft cheeks and all the snuggles I can possibly fit into a day. It is “one more minute,” of play when I can give it and boundaries when I cannot. And taking care of myself so that I am here for a very long time to savor and celebrate a long life. If you’re looking for some tools to find your own focal points there’s a great guide here.

Notice What Fills You and Follow It

This life is about creating spaces where I am comfortable, inspired, held and free. Finding a way to make every hope, wish, and dream I have come true because when I am building and growing, and reading good books I feel whole. Eating good foods and traveling, inspires me and stretches my wings. Learning new things fills me up and keeps me interested and engaged. I am forever looking forward to all of the good that is here now, and all of the wonderful that is yet to come.

With the fall winds upon us our windows and doors are blanketed in ladybugs. Every one that lands and stays, every one that I must pick up and place outside drenches me in good luck and positive thoughts. I am fortunate, blessed, grateful for all that I have and eager to see what comes next! 

How do you savor and celebrate life’s special moments? What times have been your favorites? What sacred dream are you pursuing now?

Manifesting a New Year

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Our home has been littered with lady bugs this fall and so I have no doubt that luck and good fortune will find me in 2023. These sweet little omens seem to be showing that good luck will be beating down my door and crawling in through every crevice. Therefore this time is sacred and to be savored. Cheers to our 2nd Birthday AWritten! Here’s how I am manifesting a new year and what I hope to share with each of you on this site and in the world.

Goals

As I envision the year ahead and what I want more of in my life I am noticing patterns. This new year’s dreams are very focused on health, well-being, home, family, and travel. These are goals for my very real and current life. They are strategies of how to live joyfully, healthfully, fitfully, and authentically. These goals are about embracing family, building a close knit community, and engaging fully with life. 

Environment 

The year appears to be about rest and recovery. My focus is on creating spaces and environments that serve deeper care of self and family. The goal is to create convenience and useful spaces that support and serve our lives. This includes this space we share here – our virtual living room where we connect.

Methodology

The year will not be focused on accomplishments, though I am sure there will be many. Nor am I focusing on adventure or change – though both are inevitable. The focus for this new year is on savoring beauty, rest, natural wonders, delicious foods, and simple pleasures. 

I primarily envision this year in neutral colors though there are a couple bold choices that appeal to me as well. There is a lot of simple elegance and grace which feels both authentic and present – a goal worthy of pursuit. To create beauty, absorb and appreciate it in the natural world and in the creative endeavors of others. I want to appreciate what I have already without longing for what is to come.

Timing

There is a calling to shared love, and honesty. A welcoming of self and others to share in my life, hearth, and home. Together we grow, support and nurture health in our lives. Sharing gentle and generous wellbeing with family and friends. 

It is preparing so that when the appropriate moment arrives I am ready. I simply know that now is a time for comfort, serenity, and peace. My time feels as if it is finally stretching itself out and resting in the sun. I do not have so many obligations and responsibilities looming that I feel spread thin or unable to manage all of the demands on my time or energy. Honoring my own rhythm – working when it feels right, resting when that feels appropriate too. I am living in gentle respect for all things, the first of which is me.

Future State

I want you to feel care, elegance, and grace at every touchpoint and interaction. Making the conversion from visitor, to fan, to buyer, to evangelist seamless. I want to build relationships that feel like friendships and bonds that sustain the tests of time and turbulence – whatever that might be. A household name that is more like a friend, an aspiration, and an inspiration rather than a single item, book, or product. I want friends and strangers to feel welcomed, loved, accepted, appreciated. To feel held, free, and to have a reason to come back – as only true love can make us feel. 

I want you to know that in the background I am forever creating new material, exploring new topics, and learning all I can so that I may share my lessons learned with all of you. As we grow and plan for this space I am forever focusing on creating room for each of you to thrive here and in your own lives. 

How do you feel connected to this space? And how can our content that better serve you and your needs?

Goal Setting: Getting Started

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Today is a day of new beginnings or at least getting started. I am preparing to step forward into plans that I have been making for some time. The goals are big dreams that I have been hard at work building, in some cases, for years. The progress towards this moment has been incremental and small, ongoing and labor intensive. It’s not sexy but it’s the only way I know to get ahead. The practical steps are the keys to my success and my feeling of anticipation today is a lot like standing on a diving board. 

I have filled the pool with opportunities and all I have to do is dive into the water to swim. My small practical steps have made this moment possible; Changing habits, conservative choices focused on long term goals, and planning. There is a lot of work that goes on before we ever get to the precipice. I have found the words of Walt Disney to be particularly applicable to this process, “Everyone needs deadlines.” I might not make my deadline but by virtue of having one I do make consistent progress toward it. 

Deadlines keep me aware of the timeline of my growth. If I only say, “someday,” and not “Five years from now,” I’ve created paradox where I could accomplish that goal any day from now until my death and it will always remain “some day.” However, when I have a five year deadline I see all the things that go into that goal, the little steps, the new learning, the coaching, and experimenting. All of the necessary and unsexy failures that will go into the big changes to make them possible and all of the hours that I will need to devote and I realize that five years is not that much time. 

Five years in the grand scheme of things is a very brief period of time. It is a lifetime to children and all they cram into the first five years of their lives is monumental. Consider an infant and then a reading, walking, talking, creative, and potty trained Kindergartener who has preferences, interests, and opinions. Someone who five years ago had only the raw materials for cognitive growth and development. That child had to make something of every experience, interaction, and engagement to become the person they are at five. That is much the same for us and our goals. 

All we know is that we have a goal and we only have five years to accomplish it. Maybe it will take longer than five years to achieve. Maybe we will face unexpected challenges, delays, or obstacles but when we give ourselves a limited time period in which to work we give ourselves the thrust we need to move forward now. 

We have to step forward because to delay would make us late for our deadline. If you’re late for your flight you miss it. But if you’re late for a personal deadline we learn something. Whether we move forward towards our goals or not the time is going to pass. To me it just feels better to look back and see progress.

I recently found a goal list my partner and I created outlining our plans for 2020. We had one goal, to get our house ready to sell. And then we brainstormed a dream house. We wrote a list of all the things we wanted in our future home and what it would look like, feel like, need to be our perfect home. And here I sit reading through the list in awe. All but three items on that full page list were included in our current home. That is something to celebrate and something to acknowledge – we made that possible. 

We set a goal and gave ourselves a deadline and we missed it by a year – we wrote the list at the end of 2019 for 2020 and then COVID hit, an unforeseen and unprecedented challenge. We were grateful for our cozy home and to have a safe and clean place to live. But facing that challenge we recalibrated, realigned, reaffirmed our commitment to the goal of a new home. In 2021 – we moved. 

We moved into a home that checks the majority of our boxes. We could not have predicted COVID all we could predict was that the time would pass whether we took the initiative or didn’t. Fortunately, we took the initiative and because of that we get to live our dream instead of just holding it. And I will confess looking around myself and seeing my dreams come to life is significantly more satisfying than holding them close and never diving in to see what might happen. You don’t need to finish everything at once but sometimes giving yourself a shorter amount of time to accomplish a goal gives you just the right push to get it done.

What dreams do have that you have given yourself a timeline to complete? Do you set one year, five year, or ten year goals? How do you stay accountable to accomplish them?

Build Your Dream

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Be still and the Universe will bring the right people and the right opportunities into your life. Do your amazing work, bloom exactly where you are planted. Focus on yourself and your own calling. Do not be distracted as distraction is your test. You never know what opportunities will show up on your doorstep and the best way to prepare for these moments is to do your own work and mind your own business. Stay true to the work you are doing and build your dream. 

When you are doing the work that you are chosen and called to perform synchronicity clicks into place. Utilize your creativity. Work at the top of your intelligence. The universe conspires for your success. 

Like water our role is simply to follow the path of least resistance. Water flows to sea level following the easiest route it can find. Water does not run uphill but wears away obstacles with the patience of time. What a fantastic example for how to pursue your goals! Do what makes sense and what comes next. Simply do the the next right thing, whatever that is for you. By doing those things that you know rather than waiting for direction, or for some decree on high, you communicate to the universe that you are ready. You have found your vibration. 

Do not wait until someone instructs you or gives you permission, give yourself those gifts. Simply do what you already know comes next, take ownership and responsibility for your own work.

Building a dream can be challenging but it should never feel like you’re working against the grain – go with your gut and do your best. Pursue your dreams doggedly but do not give yourself or your power to someone else. Always put yourself, your goals, and your plans first.

If you do not pursue your own dreams there is always someone willing to pay you to help them achieve theirs. If you must work for someone else, do so with full knowledge that you are getting them and their goals ahead. And when you are ready to pursue your own projects give the same attention and effort to your own work. If possible give more, because your work deserves your best. After all your work is a representation of you out in the world. Build your dream. Show it. Shine a light on it. You are worthy of love and attention!