Tag: Presence

How Does Happiness Feel to You?

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Let’s share a meditation today. Simply copy down the headers and write your own responses. I’ve included my answers for inspiration. I’m excited for you to use this tool to bring you into the present moment and more in touch with yourself. The goal is figure out how happiness feels to you so you can add more of it to your daily life.

Look

To me, happiness looks like a luxuriously appointed room, with panoramic views of trees, wildlife, and gardens. They could be oceans, lakes or mountains but the glory of wide open spaces is mine to enjoy. I have time and freedom to savor it. To me, happiness looks like I have space to myself, peace, and the promise of adventure.

Feel 

Happiness feels soft like throw pillows, cozy fireplaces, and hot tea. It feels serene and gentle, like my dog at my feet. It feels expansive and as if I do not need to strive but I may settle, be at ease and rest.

Taste

It tastes like hot chocolate and delicious meals that feed, fuel, nourish and surprise me. Rich flavors that feed my soul and my heart’s longing for fulfillment and adventure.

Smell

Happiness smells like a new book and typewriter tape. It smells like ink, sea salt, and sunset. The lush abundance of freshly mown grass and ripe summer peaches. It smells wholesome and rich, tender and calm.

Sound

It sounds like a fireplace crackling. Happiness sounds like woodland walks on secluded paths. To me it is symphony music and the effervescent bubbles of champagne. 

That is what happiness feels like for me. And reading it over, most of it includes activities I share with my dog. So maybe, for me, happiness is life with my trusty pup. How lucky are we to live in a world with dogs?

Did you try the exercise? How does happiness feel for you? 

Cold Hands Warm Heart

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Tips for Making Every Day Routines Sacred

When I was little my aunt used to tell us, “Cold hands warm heart,” whenever we put our icy hands in hers. She would come in from outside, we knew we were getting gentle and cold fingers on our necks and big hugs. It was such a part of our winter routine that now I say the same thing to my kiddos, “cold hands warm heart,” and bury them in my arms. It is a ritual and a memory, a simple way to make common occurrences sacred. 

This winter I am striving to create more meaning in my daily practices. My showers, skin-care routine, the way I go to sleep and the way I wake up. These are daily events that I often rush through. Time lost in the past or in the future – Did I put the clothes in the dryer? I need to pick up milk. The saddest part is that this happens every day. By focusing on our anxieties or worries we loose opportunities to create nourishing rituals.

Tips to make small moments brighter.

  1. I purchased a small box of mindfulness cards that I open each morning to give me a mantra, intention, or reflection that I can use to intentionally begin my day.
  2. Adding sweet smelling soaps and lotions to my showers and skincare routines. They add delight to the experience and remind me to slow down.
  3. Cookies! After my meditations I am savoring chocolate shortbread cookies with strawberry icing. These sweet treats being a little taste of summer into my chilly winter afternoons.

None of these shifts is monumental or expensive. Yet they are excellent tools for making my everyday routines sacred. I am feeling hot water raining down on my skin, smelling coconut and remembering summer, beaches, and fun. The biggest revelation is the practice of staying in the moment. I am not just going through the motions. Beginning my day engaged and delighting shifts my perspective and improves my mood.

The simple act of enhancing my daily practices makes my life richer. It is wonderful to be able to brighten my own day and surprise myself. It is the little things that make life nice and remind us of the many joys of being alive. We don’t always have to remodel the kitchen or take off on vacation to feel special. Sometimes all it takes is a cozy reminder – cold hands warm heart, have a hug, we’re so loved. 

What little gifts can you give to yourself that would make life more lovely? How do you make your daily routines special? What scents bring joy to your heart or what loving sayings did you grow up with in your home?

Trusting the Universe and it’s Timing

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Some days I get impatient with my blessings. I want certain things to arrive by a specific date. Or I am tired of waiting because I want something fun and exciting to start. But as I do this I am wishing away the joy of the moment. I am envisioning some better tomorrow when what I have and what I only have ever – is this moment right now. Wishing for another day so some future pleasure or experience to delight me distracts from the wonder and the beauty of the present moment. It’s what Daniel Tiger calls, “Enjoy the Wow in the Now.”

Those words are magic at our house – and so apropos particularly when talking with our children. They are so eager for dessert, a family movie night, or for the weekend that it’s easy to forget that what they’re doing in the moment is pretty lovely too – eating a home cooked meal with family, reading and cuddling on the couch, or on their way to practice a sport or activity that they love. As an adult it’s pretty easy to get caught up in this mindset too – constantly wishing and hoping for what comes next and forgetting to enjoy the moment. Particularly because everything that I once dreamed of I am enjoying now. 

My entire life was once a hope and a dream that has manifested before me. I was speaking with my Grandmother recently and we were going through so old family papers, mixed in the pile was a letter she had sent as a young mother to her own mother on vacation in Florida. She wrote of the schedule her children were keeping that week and as I read she laughed. She said, “I have no idea how I kept track of all of that!”

The woman raised eight children and the list of activities, cub scout meetings, instrument practices, lessons, and dinners was incredible – what impressed me even more was that not only did she have time to remember all of those things but she sent dinner over for her mother’s neighbors, picked up the mail at her mom’s house, and had time to write the letter I was now reading. The woman is a legend. And in all honesty even with email reminders, my various calendars, and sticky notes I can barely keep track of our sweet little family of four let alone, juggling which kid was given permission to borrow the car and what lessons they were delivering the rest to attend before going to work. 

My grandmother says those were the happiest time in her life, those days when she was so busy she just did things all day. And she points out that she didn’t know it then. Because how could she have? I think it’s a wonder she even brushed her teeth or remembered to comb her hair. And yet she did it all, she wore lovely dresses, was an active member of her church, President of the Mother’s Club at her son’s school, and a devoted and loving parent and partner. When I look at a life like hers I am struck by how she must have lived in the moment. She must have remained focused on each task as a single step. 

I am not jealous or eager to replicate her “Busy,” but what I believe the pace of her life did was force her to be in the moment. She didn’t have an opportunity to focus on the future or to strategize because with so many moving parts, pieces, people, she had to be fully present exactly where she was at that moment. And that is what I strive to remember.

When I am longing for the future or eager to skip ahead to the part where I’m a famous writer, traveling in private jets, appearing on talk shows to discuss my work, and speaking to large groups to share what I have learned along the way I try to remember that the magic is happening right now. The magic is in my son inviting me to come play with him. The magic is in the moment as I write these words. The magic is not some distant goal or dream – which will come whenever the universe and I am ready, I have no doubt. The magic is in enjoying this moment – the process of writing, the delight that comes when my child and I are playing in our imaginations together, and the very real and sacred beauty that exists in the here and now. The silence of my studio, the warm glow of the light at my side, the rumble in my tummy that tells me it’s time for dinner. All of this is a gift for which I am truly grateful. This life is so wonderful and there will be more amazing and wonderful things to come however the most magic exists in the here and now and the best thing I can do is be present and savor it because this is truly the best time of my life and the only time I have to live it.

What do You Want This Year’s Story to Be?

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I would like my story to be one of joy, authenticity, and arrival. I want the work of the past several years to come to fruition in the most wholesome and honest way possible. I want to build and grow and strive but also to feel completely at home where I am and with what I am doing. I want sunshine and rest. I want joyful productivity, the good and satisfying tired that comes after an honest day’s work. I want my health and wellbeing to be melded into my collective health. I want to carry deeper spirituality. I want to hold the truth of who I am in my heart and engage with the world from that perspective. I want to be confident and forthright. I want to take on the tasks that challenge, delight, and amaze me – I want to grow into exactly who I am and show up where I am meant be.

I want it to be a year of flowering and coming into full bloom. I want it to be a a year of ownership and celebration of my accomplishments and a a pride in my work and success. I want the year to include staying the course and walking my own path, stepping into my destiny. I want gentle sunny afternoons, time with true friends who understand and delight me, conversations that fill me up and give me new ideas to contemplate. I want soul crushing awareness and truth. I want to be who I am in every room I enter. I want to draw towards me those people who are on the same page and who not only support my growth and success but who push me to that next level by being so amazing themselves that they inspire me to rise above where I am to get to where I am going.

I am hopeful, that this year will be the first of many where I walk forward proudly with head held high and with the courage of the battles I have already fought and won. I want this year to be a deep honoring of how far I’ve come and of where I am going. 

Professionally, I want to make new connections and build bonds that further my career. I want to savor and enjoy old friendships that have sculpted me into the woman I am now. I want a victory lap so to speak, an inspiring journey that gives me fortitude, strength, and ownership of every step I take. I want the year to unfold naturally, I want nothing contrived or forced. I want true connection and not speed. I do not want to rush or push, I want to bloom and unfold the layers of life like a gentle rose lifting its petals to the sun. Time is short, life is brief, and that is why I feel we are all compelled to enjoy it now. The dogged urgency with which we pursue our goals and dreams need not be a continuation of capitalism and “the grind.” We need not, “hustle for our worthiness,” but rather step into the arena bearing the message already written on our hearts. Graciously offering what we have to the world and welcoming the love and recognition that comes from being truly seen. 

I want to work towards this authenticity daily. I want to carry this bravery within myself proudly. I want to embrace who I am, what I am about, and show up for my journey prepared but also gently. I am not here to sprint, overwork, or sacrifice my health or wellbeing for accomplishment or recognition – in fact while recognition is lovely this work is a labor of love. My work is an offering, to the universe, to the world, to others, given freely and without expectation. I hope you love it. I hope my work serves you. I hope what I create in some small way changes the world and people’s lives for the better.  More than anything I hope it calls to what is true and honest and deep in you and encourages you to share what bounty and beauty you have inside of yourself.

I do not hope to be the figurehead or the one with, “answers,” for I feel that when you find your own truth, your own answers and solutions appear. I only hope to share the path I have taken so that others may follow as so many have done for me. Much like a cat sitting in the sun I hope to be still, free, and well rested. I hope to stretch, eat well, travel, and have as many adventures necessary to keep life interesting and as many peaceful afternoons necessary to keep me comfortable and at ease. 

Ease is such a large part of this plan as well. My plan is not to overthink or overcomplicate my life with plans that are too ornate or strategies that feel more like plans of attack. I am taking each day one sunrise and sunset at a time. I am enjoying the length of afternoons and the warmth of sunshine. I am resting and focusing on only doing one thing at a time. I am not multi-tasking. This year my hope is to be still, enjoy the journey, and give myself everything I need to thrive. 

That is my hope for this new year, what is yours?