Tag: staying centered

5 Minutes Planning to Save 15 Minutes Work

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I am finding myself in need of the reminder that five minutes of planning will save fifteen minutes of work. I’m rushing and pushing myself to complete so much in a day, forgetting that every day will have its responsibilities, duties, and challenges. And if I am perpetually pushing myself forward toward that next thing I am not able to savor the moment nor am I accomplishing those goals that I have set for myself. I am in need of a refresh, a break, and a vacation. Lately I have been blazing through the day like a warrior, only to conk out at night exhausted but also too tired to plan for the next day. 

Today a meeting was cancelled and that was such a relief. I have over-scheduled and overcommitted myself to so many projects, it’s time to breathe and take a break. It is time to refocus and establish how I would like to show up in the world. I am grateful for the opportunity to be still for a bit. This season has seen me pressing forward and pushing through. Now it is time to rest and reconfigure. I do that by remembering that work will always be there, there will always be another task, more to do, and always someone else asking for more of me. But what I need to give is less, I need to focus on myself, align my actions with my core values and pick and choose those activities to which I will give my energy. Here’s how I’m going to do that: 

Stop: I’m going to stop jumping to finish that, “one last thing,” or shoot off a quick email. I need only to take in the information. Rushing at the speed of light does not enable me to deliver my best work. The first key to doing too much is to stop.

Breathe: The next step I am taking is finding my center, aligning myself before acting. When I rush I take on more than my fair share. I overcompensate for others and the work they are not doing. I stay busy while other people have too little to do. I need to give others the space to step in and step up to help – which they can’t do if I’m in the way. 

I need to take a little bit of time to recalibrate and decide how I want to spend my energy and my time. If it is on this project, or this call, or this email, that’s great – but if these things are not fueling me and will not satisfy my larger plan or highest self, I need to let them go.

Discern: A couple years ago my focus for the year included discernment, which is the ability to listen and trust your inner knowing. Discernment means you don’t make a snap decision, go with the crowd, or do whatever is suggested. Discernment is the practice of looking within to make your decisions and trusting that your inner and deeper knowing will guide you down the path you should be walking – it already knows where you want to end up. 

Discernment is not easy, especially because we are often marketed to, nudged, and talked into acting in certain ways. We are encouraged to buy these items, dress this way, and perform as a cast and not live as real people – who are flawed and messy and do not have perfect hair all the time. To learn more about discernment I would encourage you to read my piece on how to incorporate discernment into your daily life – what I learned after a year of practicing discernment. 

Decide and Hold Strong: Once you have made your decision or selected those items that you want in your schedule and in your life, hold your boundaries firm. We all slip and we all sometimes get submerged – or re-submerged – by the onslaught of attention and activities and FOMO. When you make a decision it’s easy to feel tempted to break your promise to yourself in order to please another person – don’t! You’re learning to trust yourself and building trust with yourself, your “you time” is your priority and it is sacred. Don’t break you appointments with yourself in order to accommodate another person, you will only feel as if you have abandoned yourself and before long you’ll be stretched too thin. (This happens and it happens all the time, in which case just jump back to step one, Stop, and follow the steps from there.

Holding space for ourselves and setting boundaries is difficult. It can be especially hard when you’re choosing from a collection of opportunities you don’t want to miss out on. But as you practice discernment and holding your boundaries you start to see and feel your life moving with new momentum towards the things and people that bring you the most joy – and isn’t that the way every day should be? Shouldn’t everything we do move us closer to our goals, highest power, and happiness? What steps do you take when things get crazy and you start to feel overwhelmed? Any tips or tricks I might want to learn too?

Three Steps to Staying Centered

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There’s a lot of frenetic energy out in the world lately. As people rush to obtain vaccines, we’re all eager to travel, and all of us hoping to return to the normalcy of daily life – pre-pandemic. I’m hopeful for a return to normalcy. The comfort of hugging a friend hello. The simple joy of saying, “God Bless You,” rather than thinking, “What fresh hell is this?” Still as we all adjust to a pace that is slightly faster, as more opportunities to spend time together open up, and as the weather blesses us with the warmth and sunshine of spring I am attempting to stay grounded. 

There are a few practices that are giving me comfort as I consider for myself and my family what the future might look like for us. The following simple practices are helping me to balance my desire to get out in the world safely and my need for change, growth, and progress.

Walks – My son and I take daily walks – and sometimes when one of us is angry we’ll go on a walk until we’re ready to talk about it. We take Dr. Brenee Brown’s research into breath work and exercise and apply it to our conflicts. Exercising, getting out into nature, and allowing ourselves to be distracted and embraced by the beauty we find outside.

Meditation – I have had, “meditate daily,” on my new year’s resolution list for five years now, and I never seem to find the time. Lately, I have made it part of my afternoon routine. Walk, lunch, meditate, and write. I use the guided meditations provided by The Mindful Movement, you can find them on YouTube or simply Google a guided meditation for the amount of time you have to work with at the moment. I feel most refreshed after 20 minutes, but any amount will do.

Breath work – Just taking deep breaths. I find my anxiety flares up when I spend too much time staring at screens. This happens with work, my phone, email. Sometimes it seems every screen I see drains something from me. So taking a break to make the bed or clean up the accumulated cups, cords, and clutter that seem to accumulate around my work space – I take a moment to breathe deeply. I’m not religious about it but that simple intentionality helps me to feel grounded and connected to the present moment.

I must say that with these practices I have found myself more present, still, and calm. There’s always something that can rattle us or distract us from who we want to be, what we want to accomplish, and the universe typically finds a way to test our boundaries. It seems to me that when I’m feeling proudest of my progress that is when the universe starts poking, just to see if I’m serious. This week it came in the form of work emails and overtired kiddos not willing to help clean up dishes without a fight. But even as these minor annoyances piled up, as they do at the end of the day, I was able to stay calm, take my main culprit on a walk and work out the challenges together. I know this won’t work every time and there will still be moments where I am not at my finest – but if I can send an email that says, “Wonderful – thank you!” instead of, “Listen here buddy,” I know I’m making progress and staying true to who I am and who I want to be in the world rather than reactive to every curveball that comes my way.