Creating a Self-Care Plan

Taking action to preserve or improve our health is a necessary practice. When creating a self-care plan of your own it’s important to remember that it’s not necessary to address every area of your health or wellness at once. It is much more effective to select a few areas to address and change or try new ones over time. The following is a list of areas of health we can work to improve: 

Environmental – recycling, planting a personal or community garden.

Emotional – Activities that involve each of your senses can help you improve emotional health. Anything that engages smell, taste, touch, sight, and sound.

Intellectual – Read a book, relax, taking a break.

Occupational – Balance between work and leisure time. Building relationships with coworkers and industry peers.

Physical – Exercise, eat a variety of healthy foods, taking a walk outside

Spiritual – Creating a quiet space for solitude and contemplation can be useful for improving your spiritual health.

Financial – Following a budget, cutting back, or limiting unnecessary expenses.

Community – Turn to a partner, friend or family member when you feel overwhelmed.

When self-care is practiced regularly it helps buffer the impact of a mental health challenge. When we care for ourselves we are better equipped to help ourselves and others. Self- care is an important tool to help achieve wellness. It is a deeply personal process of regaining physical, spiritual, mental, and emotional balance. It means different things to different people.

During stressful times in life, people naturally carry their stress with them everywhere they go. Whenever you feel overly stressed, or better yet before you feel overwhelmed, it may be a good time to focus on self-care.

When was the last time you did something to take care of yourself? How has self-care helped you to maintain balance in your life?

Monthly Agenda Ideas

I’d like to share an aspirational guide for how to show up in the world with intention and create opportunities for deeper connection with those we love. 

Therefore, in hopes that this agenda might inspire you, as it does me, I have included below a list of monthly options to enrich your life and the world. I read it somewhere and copied it down. If you know where this came from, or if it is yours, please let me know so that I may give credit where credit is due! – Update this list originally came from Jared Sawyer Jr. (@JaredSawyerJr) a minister, musician, and author. Thank you Jared!

  1. One day date with a friend
  2. 24 hours with NO social media
  3. One day outdoors
  4. One evening out with friends
  5. One date night (Even just by yourself)
  6. One breakfast with friends
  7. One movie night
  8. One day serving others
  9. One day completely to myself
  10. One date night with each child

This agenda is not intense and in fact it creates space and ease in life to know what is coming next. I am sincerely going to attempt to apply these steps to make my life more splendid and well rounded. Though in all sincerity I will need to adopt the strategy of the Danes, wherein they plan their agendas weeks ahead. I find that as I get older it becomes harder and harder to gather with friends and even when we do plan in advance it seems we aren’t always able to connect – throw in covid and it is practically impossible to make a plan. That said, efforts will be made and hopefully these little steps will come together to make all our lives fuller and more authentically connected. I hope they make your life a little more lovely too. 

What strategies have you employed to stay connected to loved ones? How do you make time for connection in your daily life?

New Year, New Approach to Progress

It’s halfway through January and I am already sensing a transition or shift in this new year. Time is moving as quickly as it ever has but I am not rushing with it. I have noticed that I am taking smaller, more practical steps toward my own goals and progress. I am also celebrating where I am and feeling contented, rather than displeased or eager for the next step. I am where I am supposed to be in this moment and I am grateful that where I am is so wonderful and that I have the good fortune to be here, breathing air and living life, to enjoy it. 

Let’s begin with the practical steps, as those of you who have been following know and for those of you who have not, we moved last summer. After nine years in our starter home it was time for more elbow room. Covid helped us along in this decision, but it was getting to be time. That said we have a new home and since we do not live on HGTV, the progress from new home to our home is a slow and steady process. We believe in living in a home for a while to determine what we like, don’t like, and how we are going to make the space more our own. We also do not have a limitless budget and so our choices are practical and timed out – we have not simply gutted the place. 

We have however made some small but deliberate changes and updates. I’m really noticing that this year, unlike years past that I am being more patient with progress. I am enjoying the process more and being more intentional with my choices. I know what I like and I know what works for us. I also know that Rome was not built in a day. As I consider these truisms I’m grateful. I’m grateful that instead of feeling like I have not done anything or beating myself up because my progress has been slow I am savoring the moment. 

Growth and change are never easy. The shift from one home to another is a big one and all of the solutions we hoped for in this home will not simply appear overnight. As we learn more about how we live in this space and we recognize our own needs in this house I am taking practical steps. 

We have larger visions and dreams – much like I have larger visions and dreams for this year as a whole – but instead of looking at my larger picture goals and thinking, “Whelp, I haven’t accomplished them yet, I might as well quit, or pick a new goal.” Instead, I am thinking, “How can I make these goals smaller?” I don’t eat an entire candy bar in one bite, I break it into pieces (because I’m a lady). Also, because it is impractical to do so, and a mess. So rather than penalizing myself for not stuffing everything I want to do into the first three weeks of a new year, I am congratulating myself for taking smaller bites. For not feeling as if I have failed because in such a short time my large goals are incomplete. 

Yearly goals, are just that, goals for the entire year. If they were easy enough to be solved within a week, they would not be on my annual list. They would be on my much shorter daily agenda. That said, I can make progress. Ina Garten recommends two steps every week to accomplish a goal and I have found that wisdom to be timeless and useful. I may not get something new completed in our new house every day – I’m still trying to remember where I put away the cleaning rags thank you very much. But I can order new light fixtures for the front hall. I can organize my Pinterest page and whittle down my options for rugs. These are not the re-design of the entire house but with these small steps I can make progress toward that goal. It will not be done in a day but with a couple steps forward every week, by the end of the year that’s 104 steps further than I was on new years, and already 52 steps ahead of when we moved in last summer. I’m already ahead and with continued progress this house will be a totally different place when we’re done with it – it will be our place and that makes it home. 

How do you stay motivated to accomplish larger tasks? What keeps you moving forward rather than giving up? 

Resolutions and Goals: A Template

Resolutions and Goals: A Template

Today I want to share some of my plans for the new year to give us all a jump start. I actually wrote this goal template years ago in a journal and reference it throughout the year as the mood strikes me. Over the past decade I have found these goals to be a timeless guide to help me stay on track and grow in any direction I choose. I hope this goal outline does the same for you as they are designed to be supportive not restrictive. Please make it your own goal outline and add or remove whatever pieces suit you and your life best! 

Fitness

  • Massage Quarterly
  • Yoga Weekly
  • Meditation Daily

Relationships

  • Make time for reciprocal relationships
  • Prioritize my partner/ family first

Career

  • Do what I love on my own terms
  • Be engaged, excited, and challenged by my work

Education

  • Read (I track my reading list here on Goodreads) 
  • Take training courses that inspire and teach me new things Monthly

Faith

  • Meditate
  • Go on retreat – full disclosure, this stays on the list but I haven’t gone on “retreat,” since high school 🙂 Beach vacations count as does anything that inspires awe!

Family

  • Plan your Joy
  • Make time to have fun together

Financial 

  • Invest wisely
  • Pay off debts
  • Make a Plan for the Future – This plan changes annually as we reach goals we celebrate and then make new ones!

Happy planning, I hope this little list serves you as it does me! Best wishes for a New Year full of all that you dream and more!

New Year New Beginnings: Tools for Writing Your Best Resolutions

This afternoon’s mediation was on the new year and new beginnings. What do I want my story to be? Thinking about these pages and these posts. I am thinking about my love for this work and my desire to keep doing it. My dreams and goals for the coming year involve growth and hope. I am not unhappy where I am, instead I am deeply grateful to be exactly where I am in the world doing exactly what I am doing. This year I would like to practice more bravery and less trepidation – I would like the courage to leap and test my wings. I am also eager to invest in myself and my goals. Now that I have shared what my goals will be, let me share how I plan to pursue them – or rather the steps I take to keep myself aligned and working towards these goals. 

My goals for any new year are not so simple as two bullet points to start. In fact, I start with a word web, I draft and write about the things I am proud of from the past year – I pull out last year’s map and look at what I had dreamed and hoped to do and then I look back over the past year and see what items I accomplished. This is often a very rewarding experience because it reminds me of who I was the year before and what was on my mind, what I was looking forward to, and what hopes I had for myself in the previous year.

Then I look at the items I did not accomplish, those goals that were perhaps longer term than a single year, or more likely, those goals that I wanted a year ago but no longer align with where I’m going or who I am. Sometimes, they are just flukes of timing. My wish to travel more in 2020, certainly did not get accomplished. It was and is a wonderful plan, something I am finding ways to do in the U.S. for the time being. We had some exciting adventures planned, I’m looking at you Ireland. But the universe had other plans in mind and that plays a valid part in goal attainment, learning to be flexible and finding the joy where you are is an important skill set to expand as well. Bloom where you’re planted and so on. 

After I review the previous year and collect those goals that I am still pursuing, I celebrate. I was able to accomplish so much in a single year. It’s important not to just move the goal post and move on. By that I mean, and I’m learning and re-learning this all the time. It is important to celebrate your wins. You have to enjoy the good times because they sustain us while we endure life’s challenges. I make time to be good to myself, congratulate myself, and celebrate how far I’ve come before I move on to planning how far I’m going to go next. Not every field has an awards show or ceremony, and not every goal is that public, whatever your accomplishment or feat, I hope you take a break to savor the moment and honor all of the work it took to get you to that place. 

After the appropriate amount of celebration, only you know this time frame, a night, a week, the entire next year, that’s your call. But once it’s done, I collect my goals from the previous year that went unmet and I write them onto a new web, I add and fill in all of the ideas I have for the next year. I flesh out what those accomplishments will look like for me. And I determine what high level goals will be my priorities. I try to limit my top priorities to one or two goals, that seems to be the limit on what I can juggle and keep track of throughout the year. For example: a couple years ago the goals were, “more discernment and more fun.” Before that I made the goal, “the year of us,” making a point to spend more time with my partner and build that bond from which all of my other bonds grow. I choose differently each year and in the end that helps me to remain a fairly well-rounded person. 

Another way to keep yourself well rounded is to separate your goal web into different areas from the jump – I include the following, self, relationships, work, spirituality, physical health, and mental well being. Each of these areas is necessary for a full life and each of them requires efforts to the exclusion of others. You cannot do all of these things at once and by creating a web it very quickly becomes apparent which areas I am focusing on and which areas need a little more attention. When I break these pieces of my life into their own separate sections it’s easier to see where my areas for growth really are and where I am strongest. It also helps me to see where my plan and my path is taking me. 

Usually, once the annual web is created I simplify the larger ideas. Some areas overlap and if I’ve written an idea more than once, I know that goal is something that should rise to the priority list. My priority list is a short selection of 10 or fewer supplemental goals that I want to call attention to since I felt the need to add them to my web multiple times. 

In the end my resolutions take two pages – the rough draft web that I hold onto for the following year’s review and the clean list. The top of the page shows my one or two primary priorities. Then the list of ten, or fewer, high level goals from all areas and the web which lists in greater detail those items I really value, they meant so much I chose to write them down. 

Early in the year I check back on my list periodically to see how I’m doing and gauge my progress. But typically, by the middle of the year I have completely forgotten the list and go about my daily life, this way when I come back New Year’s week it is always a delight somewhat of a surprise to see what items were on the list. It’s a wonderful experience to look back over how far I have come in a single year. For me the exercise can be time intensive which is why I usually set aside a couple of days to reflect, review, and write out what I’m thinking. I find it is a lovely process to complete New Year’s week. 

For me resolutions are cathartic, the process of selecting and writing them delights me as much as planning for their accomplishment. It is a gift to have this life to plan and hope for. It is a joy to be surrounded by time and energy to pursue my goals. I hope this little road map helps you as you look at your own life, reflect on how far you’ve come, celebrated what you’ve done already, and look forward to what is next!  I can’t see where 2022 take you – I’m already so proud of you for being here! Wishing you health, wealth, and success in 2022 – whatever those words mean to you! Love, MK