Tag: surprise

Combating Negative Self-Talk with Magic

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I read recently, “You don’t have to to have it all figured out to move forward.” It makes me think of my highlight reel of negative self talk – the judgments that seem to always be with us and leading us to feel as if I need to improve, quickly. Researchers estimate that we think about 50,000 to 70,000 thoughts a day – and that about 80% of those thoughts are negative. The messages that we haven’t done enough or that we aren’t enough, can leave us feeling defeated. Which in turn keeps us trapped in that negative feedback loop and in some cases can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. 

Being in this place is exhausting. The repeated messaging that we aren’t enough wears us down – and by virtue of listening to it, and worse yet believing it, we stay stuck. We begin to believe we can’t do all that we want and because we believe it, it becomes true. That false belief saps our energy and leaves us feeling too worn down to pursue our goals or even to take that next step.

Negative self-talk is a workhorse – it simply plows the same row every day. It does not like obstacles or challenges, it just wants to plod the same path and get back to paddock by sundown. This routine may not work for us any longer, we may want to shift gears and try something new but that horse just wants to tread the familiar path. It does not like flashy colors or new routes, in fact if not for the passage of time it would hoe the same row every day if it could. The routine is predictable, the routine is safe, the routine assures that we will get back to the paddock just as we left it. There will be no injuries or negative push-back because we will have done the same thing every day. And walking that path is easy, we know we have the fitness for it, we know the way and won’t get lost. It is easier to do the same thing every day and not make any changes.

The old line, “the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results,” comes to mind. We can’t do the same things if we want different results. We cannot continue our current exercise routines and wake up one morning to run a marathon. When we get caught in a comfortable routine we can find ourselves fearful or hesitant to try something new – we’re afraid to leave our comfort zone. That is understandable because the workhorse in us just wants to get back to the paddock safely and the only way to guarantee that outcome is to take the same steps over and over. 

The thing is that if we never try something new or step out of our comfort zone we leave no room for magic or inspiration. We simply get home safely with nothing new to share at the dinner table. There’s a lot to be said for the joys of a simple life and a smooth day but if your heart is longing for a little adventure, wanderlust, or surprise. I hope you’ll coax that workhorse out of its rut and take a ride into town. I hope you’ll stretch in a new direction or try a new routine. You don’t have to wake up and go hot air ballooning but maybe try a new breakfast recipe, or meet a friend for lunch. Make time and space in your life for magic and see if it doesn’t add a spring in your step, a richness to your life, and a little spark that you might nurture into something new for yourself and the world. I am going to try it and I hope you do too – tell me what new things you try below! 

Staying Present: Opossum Invasion

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We’ve been invaded. The double edged sword of living in such close proximity to nature. We love the beautiful trees, the expansive vistas and looking out our windows at nothing but green leaves and sky. But this also means we are right in nature’s lap. The first things our neighbors warned us to watch out for was the wildlife. Our yard is apparently a parade route for foxes, coyotes, and a family of albino opossums – just to name a few. 

This afternoon I took the dog out and walked into the garage when I decided to check on my son’s toys. The door from the house to the garage was not closed tightly and I wondered if he had perhaps left a mess that might inadvertently result in one of his toys being run over or someone tripping. While looking on the far side of the garage I noticed that our blinds had fallen. Then I noticed a face looking back at me. 

A distinctly rodent face that looked too large to be a mouse but was shaped like one. It looked lighter in coloration so either an albino opossum child or a rat. The doleful and kindly eyes lead me to believe it was an opossum but I promptly moved to open the garage to let whatever it was escape – as it was clearly attempting to do through the window.

The garage door is open and I am now reflecting on what items will need to be brought in from the garage – which items I hope and pray have not been nibbled or burrowed in or soiled. Shoes, toys, golf clubs, my hope is that the little invader was only in there for the night and is just hungry and trying to find their way home to their family. Still the idea of some animal in and among my things uninvited makes me squirm. I do not like rodents and least of all rodents in my space and unexpectedly wreaking havoc in my home. Oh, yuck, yuck, yuck. 

I know it is we who are at fault as it must have wandered in while we were outside in the yard. I hope it did not make its own way into the garage as that opens up a whole new crop of items to address. Still if it has, we will deal with it and I am grateful to have learned this lesson so early and in the spring months. I am grateful that it was me who found the intruder and not one of my children who could have been scared or worse yet bitten just because they didn’t know the animal was there and scared it. I’m grateful that we have the ability to send the little beast on its way without harm. I’m grateful that we live in this area and delighted that nature always finds a way. 

I have been searching my lawn night and day these last few weeks hoping to catch a glimpse of a fox, coyote, deer, or opossum and the sweet little darlings brought the show to me. God has a sense of humor. These are the unexpected moments that truly make us feel alive and bring us into the present. There’s nowhere else to be when confronted with a furry faced friend in the dark of a garage. I hope it finds its way home safely. I hope I did not scare it too much with the noise of the garage door and yelling for my partner. I’m grateful for the lesson and will be glad to take it with me as we forge into spring – oh the gifts are many. I’m so glad we’re learning them now. 

What lessons has nature taught you recently?