Tag: vision

Subtracting to Add

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I recently watched an interview Trevor Noah, the former host of the Daily Show, did with Oprah. He asked her after having spoken with so many leaders in fields spanning all areas of interest and society what contributes most effectively to a person’s success. Oprah’s response was simple, “Everything – every choice and movement you make needs to be aligned with your purpose.” 

When you know your purpose you can direct your course towards making that path the one you choose to follow. Distractons delay, detour, or completely knock us off course. When you decide what it is that you want to do in this life and in the world – every step and decision you make should be in pursuit of that higher goal. Your energy, be it at rest or in motion, needs to be focused on that goal. 

To me it seemed much like writing a novel. Every line needs to have a role. Every word written must be necessary and relevant. Superfluous language or details only distract from your message. The purpose is the clarity of your story. If any line, paragraph, or sentence is not in service to telling your story, delete it. Every word must reveal more about your characters, provide your reader with necessary and relevant information, or it needs to be removed. Anything extra is distracting from that message. As an author this makes sense to me. It creates a solid ground and structure that I can follow. I am on a path and as I make my way towards my goal I only stay on the path that leads to better telling of this story. 

According to Oprah, this works in life as well. When you focus on your goal nothing should distract you. I have found that my heart knows what it wants it prioritizes that path anyway. The things I don’t want to do are so difficult for me to force myself to complete. There is mental and sometimes physical resistance to the things that do not serve my true purpose. It’s difficult and draining when I’m doing things that are not in service to my goal. 

I would encourage you to look at the things you are doing. What tasks feel like a breeze and you could do them all day? What projects or tasks feel like an absolute slog?

Keep a list beside you as you go through a regular day. Draw a line down the middle of the page. On the left side list the items that feel like a dream and delight you. On the other side of the line write down the tasks you completed but didn’t enjoy at all. Some things are necessary evils, we have to wash the dishes if we want to eat off of clean plates tomorrow. There are also some tasks that we do simply because we feel obligated. What terrible duties do you feel exhausted by? They are taking too much time and energy. Is it possible to delegate these tasks or remove them from your chore list entirely? Are they necessary? 

As you subtract those tasks that are not aligned with your true purpose and higher power you may find that not only are you happier but you are also free to pursue more of the good things that bring you joy and align with who you are. It may mean subtracting relationships, tasks, etc. But as you make room in your life for joy, purpose, and your dreams, life becomes a lot richer and more fulfilling. You are create space for those events, people, and projects that deeply nourish you and fuel your pursuit of your goals rather than distracting you from them. 

Shift Your Perspective on Limitless Resources

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This morning as I wrote my morning pages my world just split open with a new idea. The idea itself isn’t new but the concept is a fresh one and I’d love to share it with you. What if, like undressing at the end of a long day, we took off all of our obligations. What if we simply stepped out of our roles – even the prospect blew my hair back. The thought left me feeling expansive, lighter, free. So let me walk you through the process. 

Imagine what life might be like if you removed all of the responsibilities and obligations you have for caring for others, including yourself. What if you took a break from the roles you hold? How much space and time might that open up for you. What might you do with that expansiveness?

Let’s start with taking off our roles – imagine you had staff to manage your household. Someone to clean, cook, and manage your home. No need to discuss landscaping or grocery shop, no need to tidy or fold or dust. All of these duties are no longer yours. 

Imagine you had a caregiver to manage the needs of your family. Someone who juggled school schedules, uniforms and dress codes, field trip permission forms, pick up and drop off. Someone who shuttled your children to their various engagements, practices and lessons. You still get to be their parent who loves and supports them but the rest is gone. All of their squabbles and the daily management of whereabouts and requirements are all gone. 

Imagine your social schedule is managed by a personal assistant. They handle birthday presents for your parents, RSVP’s and calendar management, scheduling and orchestrating the business of day to day life. This person assures that your schedule brings you optimal joy and success. Never does a birthday go unacknowledged or a thank you note get lost in the mail. You are the first to RSVP to weddings, baptisms, and showers. You are able to be the friend and family member you have always wanted to be because the labor of this work is no longer on your shoulders alone. 

Imagine you are free of responsibilities for employment or financial gain or wellbeing. Wealth is plentiful and you no longer need consider the cost or the investment. You don’t need to analyze health plans or become an overnight expert on finances to complete your taxes. These tasks are managed to your optimal benefit and success. You no longer need take the time to micromanage your finances or your plans in order to create cost savings or produce profit. You are free. 

Now, if this imaginative state is not enough to blow your socks off, imagine what would you do with all of the time you have left. If instead of buzzing from one duty or task to the next you could simply, be, exist, experience. Now, what would you do? What might you have time for? Where might your focus be? What would you and your partner talk about over dinner if logistics were no longer on the table? Could you talk about joy? Passion projects? Would you still complain or nitpick? Of course, there will always be challenges but the joy – the very real joy is in the imagining. It is in the wondering – what might you do with yourself, with your time? How might you live? 

Would you go to Wimbledon? Take painting classes? Try out for a play? What adventures would you go on? Would you swim under a waterfall in Fiji? Would you fold your children’s laundry or write love letters to your spouse – not because you “had to,” but as a labor of love? What would your life look like if it wasn’t full of these tasks and to do items that take up so much of our days? 

For instance, I once read a post on Instagram from a cellist who was hired by Richard Branson to play for him. She performed while he played tennis with a former head of state. She was flown to his private island, housed, fed, and compensated for playing music while he played tennis. The idea just blew my mind. He could have played cello music on a sound system but instead he chose this indulgence for his afternoon’s delight and that of his guest. When you think about it, there are heads of state, dignitaries, business owners, and leaders across the globe who have access to staff, personal or professional, to remove these obstacles from their daily lives. It is this assistance that gives them the freedom to focus on passion projects, work, and goals.

This lifestyle exists, it is not impossible. It may be a far reach for many of us – but even the small act of imagining powerful. It allows us to consider what we might do if we had that access, those resources. If we had the ability to focus solely on what we most want to do and everyone around us conspired for our success – I wonder who we might shape the world differently? How would you change the world? And I mean this in a very small way – none of us is responsible to reshape history on our own. But how would you change your world? How would you shift your attention and what would you do with limitless time, energy, and resources?  

Clearing the Clutter: Breaking Up with an Old Dream

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To create a new beginning something has to end. Many days I meditate on the the theme of clearing the clutter but today I moved actual boxes. I did the mental work first, the figurative exercise to create mental space, and to free my mind from the obligations that seem to fill up my brain and leave me with no additional bandwidth to perform the actual work. All of those exercises led me to the actual labor of lifting and moving actual boxes that had found a resting place in the middle of my office. 

The space is wide open and I feel lighter, freer, less weighed down by obligations and to-do items. I recently spent some time away with friends and we talked out our visions and plans for the future. We discussed our goals and our dreams for what our lives could look like in the next five or ten years. It was powerful deep dive stuff. My friend shared that she has some big picture goals for herself and her business but she doesn’t feel ready to pursue them. I want to share what I said to my dear and life-long friend with you – that is ok too!

It is ok to have dreams that we hold off on pursuing. We often feel a sense of urgency to complete tasks. This may come from competition with others or a desire to check something off our to-do lists. But sometimes we don’t want to do something because it is not right for us. Sometimes what felt like an incredible and exciting goal turns out to be adjacent to our path but not on our journey. And that’s ok. 

Fear in creativity is important, it tells us when we truly care about something. Sometimes though when we write and reflect we learn that that goal is no longer for us. That too is a victory, we have learned something important. Just because you have had something on your list for a long time does not mean you have to finish it. If you come to a place where it’s time to step forward or let a dream go, you can let it go. You are not obligated to complete every dream or every goal you imagine. Maybe you needed that inspiration to motivate you but now that particular goal, or version of that goal, is no longer necessary and that’s ok. It is ok to let go of something you don’t want. You don’t need to do it just to prove that you can. You’re not giving up on yourself or on every dream, you are simply recognizing that that goal is no longer meant for you. You are doing enough. You have done enough. 

You do not need to take on anyone else’s goal or anyone else’s vision, even if that goal belonged to a past version of yourself. That person did not know what you know now. That person did not have the steps behind them that you have. They made the best decision with the information they had at the time and now you know more. You are further up the mountain, your view is better and your knowledge enhanced.

Trust your gut – if you’re afraid, take small steps and see how quickly the dominoes fall. If you’re hesitating because a step is not right for you, pause, reflect, and if necessary recalibrate and move on. Once you release that item your list you have freed yourself to imagine new and bigger dreams that truly fit the path that you are on. It frees you to follow your right path. Sometimes it is just time to put things away and clear the space for whatever comes next and that is truly brave.

How do you reflect and recalibrate before moving forward? How do you choose your path with intention? What is a goal you had to leave behind in order to move forward?

Expansive Meditations: Choose Your Own Adventure

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This afternoon I was completely lost in my meditation. I awakened to a feeling of lightness, freedom, and expansiveness. I lay down with the impression that I would focus on the concept, “Nothing in Nature Blooms All Year,” or “Blooming where you are planted.” Instead I feel stretched wide open and eager to make plans. I feel as if I have an opportunity to see the wide world and try new things. I am feeling like growth personified. 

We are in the midst of planning several vacations and adventures. We are dreaming of what comes next for us and what we want to do in the future. I feel burst wide open with possibilities. I could hire a yoga instructor and coach to join my girlfriends for a day on our lady-retreat. I could begin making reservations for our family vacation to see a certain mouse. I could hire my friend to take my updated portraits for my professional profile. I am brimming with ideas and when I lay down to be still and absorb I felt as if I had a finite number of items on my list and that I wanted to accomplish. Now, I feel like there is so much inspiration pouring in from every direction. The shift comes from choosing my guided meditation intentionally.

I often get into a comfortable rut, listening to the same meditations day in and day out, hoping that I will maintain the lessons I am attempting to learn by reinforcing and repeating the ideas shared. This can be true, it can be wonderful to listen to the same meditations over time as they are a solid touchpoint that remind me to be still and to savor certain concepts. However, it is just as important to spice things up – to choose the guided meditation intentionally. This process can be as simple as scrolling. 

I like to choose a guided meditation from a collection I know and trust. I like Sarah Raymond’s voice from the Mindful Movement and truly feel comfortable with her as my guide. Therefore, I quickly eliminate the vast majority of guided meditations that are not hers. I also choose my meditations based on the amount of time I have to spend, if I have time for a longer meditation I enjoy it. But if I feel rushed or stressed it distracts from the experience and so I’m sure to choose a meditation that helps me to keep my schedule and absorb what I can in the allotted timeframe. Then I search and scroll based on the parameters I have already chosen – some days it is trust in myself, other days it is inspiration to start something new. There are so many options but I often find exactly the meditation that speaks to me. And when I feel like the meditation I use is directly linked to my frame of mind it feels even more impactful and effective. 

Today I came in small and left big. It is thrilling to feel so large and wide and free. Having the inspiration to meditate is an excellent first step – but enjoying the benefits, living the calm peace and joy that comes of feeling spiritually, emotionally, and mentally aligned is a priceless gift.

How does meditation make you feel? Do you choose the same guided meditations over and over or do you change it up? What guided meditations do you enjoy most?